Who knew what a #hashtag could do?

So I'm sure that everyone has come across the #nomakeupselfie trend by now? Where ladies will post up pictures of themselves without any make up on to spread awareness of breast cancer. As ridiculous as it sounds, due to the fact that these women actually donated money as well as posted the picture, it has become a very successful venture and has even spread to #makeupselfies for men to partake in!

However, it has had a strange effect on me that I did not expect. It brought me back to 2007 when I was told that I had a "small cancer" in my neck. Acinic Cell Carcinoma in the parotid (salivary) gland to be exact. It took two surgeries and 6 months of partial facial paralysis but I was fine after that. I was lucky, I know that, but yet here I am crying. Crying! This new trend has somehow brought those feeling back to me. Feelings that I'm not sure I knew were there in the first place.

The cancer itself was never really the problem. It was a small lump and was removed before it could cause much damage. The problem is that with cancer comes the fear and emotion. It's a scary word, everyone knows that. My mother was worried about telling my Nana simply because the "C word" would cause her to panic. For someone like  me, that can be the hardest part. I was never sick, just scared. However, I don't feel that my experience should be disregarded. I still have the memories and the scar. I still know that it was there. I still get upset reading about it and the death of Adam Yauch of the Beastie Boys hit me hard. I had never heard of anyone having cancer in their parotid gland before, let alone die. The same happened when hearing that Barcelona FC manager Tito Vilanova had to take time off to recover from parotid gland cancer. They are scary shots of reality and I have no idea what''ll happen in the future even if I have no right parotid gland anymore!

So I suppose with all this I want to show you a bit of the reality of the aftermath of cancer even if it's small and you come out of it totally healthy. I am not really a fan of these trends as I never believed that they could help before but I am willing to take part in this one - my only diversion to the rule is that I am not supporting breast cancer specifically but am donating to the Irish Cancer Society in general. If there was a more specific society for my cancer I would donate to them but there isn't from what I can find in Ireland.

You'll see three pictures below. The first is my scar, or scars to be exact as they are the result of those two surgeries. The second is my make up free face - I made that face deliberately as I wanted to try show the permanent results of the facial paralysis that remain. Back in 2007 it was much worse and I am lucky that so much came back but I still have some parts that won't recover, mostly in and around my right eye. The third is my donation to the Irish Cancer Society because if I am doing this then I am doing it right. Finally, I am not nominating anyone, not everyone is a fan of these and/or wants to do it for whatever reason and I can't be the only one who is affected by this. I wasn't even planning on doing this despite being nominated. I do ask one thing. keep smiling, we all go through a lot but we should all keep smiling during and after it. :)

S